Bitter Fantasy Thomas Lipschultz 9/24/00, 12/12/00 Y'know, Maybe I'm a woman. I don't look down there very often. Bathroom time is a habit and I'm not all that hairy. But I'm not offended to see the toilet seat left up because I use it that way, and I guess a woman could too if she wanted to "hover". So maybe... I'd like to be a woman, with pretty little braids in my hair and make-up all over my face so all the guys will say wow, she's hot, I want a piece of that. And then maybe I'll be able to have other people touch the toilet seat for me. All the guys will put the seat down and me and my friends won't ever put it back up for them when the shit hits the pot. Girls have an advantage, a Queen of the Throne advantage, which is why maybe I'm a woman, so that men will woo me if I fake my face and worry over how bloody much I weigh. But I don't give a damn how bloody much I weigh and so maybe I'm not a woman after all.